We just entered the last month of the year and I think it’s time to ask ourselves What are my well-dones this year? Years ago I followed exPress-O, a blog by Diana Mieczan, that sadly doesn’t exist anymore and she asked that same question that I like to reflect on yearly ever since.
It’s easy to get hung up on the plans that fail, the goals that change or become much harder to achieve than we anticipated. If you’re really honest with yourself, I am sure a few things come to mind that fall into the well-done-category!
Consider this a year in review of your wellness and mental health, of course, it can include your career choices or relationship developments as well, but focus on your personal well-dones most of all.
three of my well-dones this year
Writing again and TMF
Personally, this very space comes first to mind. Last year around this time I knew that someday I will bring TMF back, that someday I will focus on writing and pivoting my career. It was that familiar thought of what I will do someday. And then it never happened. This year, it did! I started in late summer and was definitely in over my head. Looking back, it baffles me how much work I actually put in and still do, but I don’t regret it for a minute. I missed that creative outlet and I am so much happier having it back in my life despite the actual work it is and the juggling it requires sometimes.
Finding myself and my Relationship
This would span the last couple of years but still counts. I am in a new-ish relationship for a little over a year now. It’s the first that I would call healthy, loving, and supportive, and just what you’d envision a solid foundation to look like. For years, I had this image of love as pain and the misery fetish that is highly promoted in our society (and the movie industry) and even though I was wildly unhappy, I thought this is what it should feel like. Spoiler alert: it is not!
You should never just go with the flow or just deal with something you are not comfortable with. You deserve happiness and the freedom to be your own person in or outside of a relationship, and I am here to tell you that the possibility does exist. There are actual relationships without toxicity, passive aggressiveness, and mind games. It is very freeing on the other side! I had a lot of unlearning, therapy, and actually dating myself to do, so I was ready when I met my partner. It is still work and constant communication required but it is so rewarding when you’re both on the same page building something together!
Re-Defining what healthy means
I turned 40 this year and that in itself was a bit much to wrap my head around. Especially since I don’t feel 40, I mean what is it supposed to feel like?
What I did stop doing is buying into that thin gaze and diet culture once and for all. I still have goals when it comes to my weight that are longevity-related and not about aesthetics on social media. What I did implement this year is a workout routine that works for me and helps me tremendously mentally. It is now something I look forward to, especially weight training makes me feel mentally stronger and more balanced!
I am not restricting food short- or long-term. I eat what I want and do so with gusto! My skin is so much better, my mood is better (I am a foodie after all!) and my menstrual cycle and my mood around it improved too. My recent lab work showed positive changes in a few areas I want to improve. An overall win I am proud of!
Now It’s your turn: what Are your well-dones this year?
(I took this image from the sky outside of my apartment the other day, the colors were unreal!)